Becoming Financially Intelligent!!!

Becoming Financially Intelligent!!!

This week we will be discussing different aspects of financial intelligence.

What does it mean to become financially intelligent, to become financially independent and to also have the ability to use your finances widely and wisely in order to help others? Good question, I will leave those aspects of financial intelligence up to you. The one thing I will say however, is that it is not money which makes you a successful man or woman... Rather, it is the intent with which you have around the money you create and bring into existence which makes your attitude and better self valid in this lifetime. 

The intent which people have, creates their life. Money and the use of money is a bi-product of this intent, allowing a person depending upon their level of self-growth and spiritual maturity to create the correct amount of resources with which they envision for themselves in the creation of their success and the help of others. Considering financial attitudes, we will cover three different types of people and their varying levels of financial intelligence towards the betterment of all humanity. 

This week, some of the topics on financial attitudes, freedom and independence will be:

* Wednesday; Explorations into different types of investing by talking about Warren Buffett, his idea on wealth creation, financial capital and compound interest.

* Thursday, a discussion on Robert Kiyosaki and his ideas on the four different types of wealth quadrants and how these apply to financial investment in your everyday life.

* Friday we will talk about Winston Shrout and how his ideas on bonds, notices of interest and birth certificates have influenced people to discharge debt.

* Saturday, will explore different ways of creating income and provide a book review.

* Sunday, will explore how to save money and how to live cheaply. Helping you better afford the lifestyle that you want.

This is a short post, as life is busy. But hey... What is more important in your life, when you are busy than to explore your ability to become more finically intelligent and educated? Education be it in finance, in relationships or enhancing your health etc. involves your ability to become more intelligent and move forwards in the progression and avenues of your life. If I have learned anything over the last years of my life, it is that no one owes you anything other than yourself to create the life that you want... On your terms.

That my friends is the start of a financially independent and driven life.

Count. Daniel John Fogarty, Tuesday 29th of October 2013

Women Better Understanding Men!

Women Better Understanding Men!

Since this week has been about relationships, I thought it would be appropriate to conclude it with content on relationship coaching to improve the content of couples and their relationships. Instead of all the material on the web about how men can better understand woman, I thought it would be appropriate to review a book on how woman can better understand men.

In so doing, help men and woman in their relationships to get on better, understand one another and improve the quality of their recreational, love and social lives.

Ladies, if you would you like to understand:

* The emotional needs of men in your life?

* Be interested in understanding men better, so that they can better understand you?

* Understand what a man wants and also what he needs in life?

If so, then look into getting The Eye Of The Seductress: Vol 1 - A Workbook For Women To Learn About The Emotional Needs of Men by relationship coach Frank B. Kermit.

Frank has been a professional relationship coach for 10 years and he delivers what he promises in The Eye Of The Seductress by allowing woman to better understand the men she communicates with and encounters in all areas of her life. Be they her father, her brother, her boss, her son or her lover.

Frank B. Kermit says it on his website:

"This book was written for both women and men to understand the emotional needs of men. It is a great starting point for women and a great education for men to learn about their own emotional needs. This book is designed to teach women how to attract a man and earn his commitment. The techniques you are about to learn is based on what makes even the most notorious confirmed bachelors, and sought after men commit to one particular woman. This book is also a great resource for men to learn how to judge the value of a woman to know if she is worthy of everything he has to offer."

Personally impressed with Franks, frank professionalism and ability to help men and woman understand one another, a reviewer captured the content and importance The Eye Of The Seductress by writing:

"As a relationship coach, Frank is like the big brother that looks out for you and sees your blind spots. He tells you things that you may not want to hear but does so because he knows you deserve better than what you're allowing yourself to experience. Frank teaches women to stop wasting their time on the wrong man and how to recognize the right one. His help with bringing up topics within a relationship has been amazing!" -Patty Contenta, Sensuality Secrets.

In The Eye Of The Seductress Frank states that the ten emotional needs of men are:

1. Protection of his Reputation as Desirable.

- Protect his reputation and keep what he does in the relationship private.

2. Recharge Time.

- Allow a man the ability to have his time out.

3. Can You Mind The Store?

- Allow a man the ability to heal from injury or harm  while suspending his activities and then allow him to come back to what he does best in his life without interference.

4. She must show Compliance to his Dominance.

- Allow a man the ability to lead in the relationship.

5. Nurture of his social-personal environment.

- Help a man look after the family home, children and lifestyle of the family unit.

6. Be The Secret Keeper.

- Trust that when a man shares secrets with you that he trusts you not to break these secrets to others.

7. Put Us (The Couple) First.

- No one else comes in the way of the relationship, including family or friends.

8. Sex, Give Him The Sex He Wants.

- Pretty obvious.

9. Penis Identity.

- Support a man's self image and help him feel masculine.

10. Be feminine.

- Be attractive to him. Appreciative of him and his usefulness while being courteous and giving when he appreciates you.

After reading this book and better understanding my emotional needs as a man, I was able to look back on some of my past relationships where as a man some if not all of these emotional needs were violated and not respected. 

In one particular relationship, quite a few core of my emotional needs were violated where my partner of the time chose her friendship over our relationship. With this she also did not respect my reputation as a man and also did not keep the secrets of our relationship exclusive to the relationship by telling her friends certain private aspects which should have been kept private between us as a couple. Given this, I wish that I had Frank's book on me at the time so that I could explain to her how she broke some of my emotional needs which I needed in order to maintain our relationship together and which led us to breaking up.

So ladies, if you want to understand men then please get this book and please understand that men like woman have emotional needs. This is very important and one of the core reasons why I have written this blog post today and if you would like to find out more about this book and similar materials, you can find them here for your browsing interest:

Eye of the Seducteress Book 1 Link.

Onwards and into a new week, for this week we will be discussing financial intelligence and solidarity. Until then,

Count. Daniel John Fogarty, Real Life Development!!! - Saturday 26th of October 2013

Exploring Workplace Communication and Framing - Relationships with your Boss!

Exploring Workplace Communication and Framing - Relationships with your Boss!

 

 The relationships which we have with others in the workplace is highly important. Getting on with your co-workers and your boss/manager is important towards your survival in the workplace and will make sure that you are respected in your job. Everyone strives in their job to be excellent and this is the point of today's post, being excellent in your job and making an impression on your boss.

In the field of Study and human excellence known as NLP or Neuro-linguistic Programming there is a method of application which you can apply to your life which will impress your boss and this is known as framing and re-framing. Framing is a technique where you look at a particular challenge or problem in your life and seek to resolve it by changing the way you think. NLP helps to change the way you think about anything in life through the use of language and cognitive patterns which you can learn and apply time and time again to change your opinions, behaviours and belief systems.

In this blog post however, I am not going to take the traditional route of teaching you language patterns on framing. My reasoning behind this is that it would take too long to do so and would take away the value that I have wanted to present in this article. However, if you want to learn the langue patterns for framing and reframing in NLP then I recommend that you look at this webpage:

* Reframing website

Or read two books from Amazon:

1. Reframing: Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the Transformation of Meaning

2. Introducing NLP: Psychological Skills for Understanding and Influencing People

In this post, I will take a much simpler approach to framing and reframing by getting you to think. By getting you to think, I have found that the best way to frame and reframe is to phrase and rephrase something which bothers you in your life. You can easily phrase problems in your life by changing the way they sound. When you change the way something sounds, you are rephrasing what bothers you in a different way and this gives you the chance to look at your life from a new and novel perspective. Taking the example of novelty in this article, we will talk about something you can reframe in your working life which is the way you relate to your boss.

For those who read this post and who dislike or fear their boss, consider the types of statements you make about them such as "my boss is always rude to me", "he/she expects too much of me" or "he/she makes outlandish deadlines for my work". Considering these and similar statements which you may make about your boss for a moment, ask yourself what would happen if you rephrased or changed your above statements about them.

Take for instance how they may want too much from you, may act rude towards you or try to discipline/control you. If you consider such behaviour from your boss as negative then you will most probably continue to believe that any behaviour they display towards you is negative. However, if you also consider that your boss may be there to help you do your job better then, their behaviour may also be seen through a different perspective.

Sometimes, your boss will want you to succeed. They will often do this by setting up deadlines to help you complete your work on time. This allows you to go home early from work and may also be the incentive to have both of you be promoted to higher positions in the workplace. This of course relies on how you understand your boss and their motives.

When I worked in the corporate world, I made it a habit to understand who and what my boss was - I.e. their motives. I also worked hard at understanding how and why my boss worked and when they planned to retire etc. I did this because it enabled me to build rapport with my boss and better understand them. This gave me the slight edge, or an advantage to frame and reframe some of the challenging statements they had made towards me and what I believed the meaning of their communication was.

While their communication may have sounded negative on the surface, when I dug deeper I found that what my bosses were saying to me was actually quite motivating.  This is why I spent time to understand my boss better and ask them questions about their life outside of work. I wrote a checklist down called "ways to understand your boss better" and it looked a little like a checklist I have written below.

Check listed ways to understand your boss better:

1. Ask about their family and home life.

2. Talk about their hobbies.

3. What is their favourite meal or food.

4. Where do they see themselves in 10-15 years time.

5. What do they want to achieve.

It was a small checklist, but it was enough to help me realise that my boss was/is human too and has human emotions. I also learned that no matter how authoritarian my boss may have appeared to be, that they could also be considered the type of person who is always there to make sure that we both succeed. Otherwise they wouldn't have hired me. So with what I originally thought was many of my bosses negative attitudes, I also learned to ask myself some tough questions about my boss and what they wanted from me such as:

1. How can my boss help me complete my work on time?

2. How can my boss help me to be a better, to the point communicator?

3. How can my boss allow me to become a better team player?

4. How can I make my own and my bosses life easier?

5. How can I become their "favourite" - I.e. How can I make sure that even if my boss gets angry at me that they'll be soft on me because I am usually a hard worker.

These are some of the questions which you need to ask yourself. The types of questions that set up frames while you are working and will help you survive in the workplace while you are working there. These questions and these frames cause you to have better communication and because you have better communication you will also get better responses and respect from your boss and your co-workers.

This concludes this week on relationships and starts the week off with Financial intelligence.

Stay tuned.

Count. Daniel John Fogarty, Sunday 27th of October 2013.

Relationship days... Taking the time out to enhance your personal relationships.

Relationship days... Taking the time out to enhance your personal relationships.

In our lives we get busy paying the bills, doing our jobs, travelling to and from social events, preparing our meals and catching up with friends. Combine that with sleep, the need to prepare our clothing for work, showering, bathing and other activities and that doesn't leave much time to enhance and build those personal relationships which we have with one another.

This is why I believe in the important process of having relationship days. Relationships days are the types of days where you take a few moments to think about who is special, who is important and who you need to keep in contact with in your life.

Life goes by quickly, regardless of how old or young you are and the relationships which you build in life should be considered key to your personal survival and your interpersonal success. Because of this I make an effort to spend at least two days a week thinking about the creation, maintenance and enhancement of my own personal relationships.

I make the time to do this twice a week, because if I did not, I would not be working on myself, the ability to socialise and the improvement of my own and others relations. Relationship days are more than just being cordial, they involve you taking time out to think about who, what, when, where and how you want people to be in your life.

Because of this, I wanted to share with you some of the techniques which have lead to my own personal success with others, in the hope that you too will he able to enhance your personal relationships with others. Some of these techniques are:

THINK ABOUT ANOTHER PERSON!

* Thinking about another person.

- Call up an old aquaintence, friend or that girl or guy you met over the last week and catch up with them.

- Phone them, contact them on social media, send an email or write that old fashioned letter.

- Find out at least three things which these people have been up to over the last week, month or year since you have contacted them.

- Golden rule - Talk less about yourself, keep your focus on them.

WRITE SOMETHING SPECIAL!!!

* Write thanking you letter and thinking about you cards.

- Write something down which shows another person such as your spouce, father, mother, best friend or sibiling that you are thinking of them.

- Write something personal in the letter from as mundane as "thank you for making me dinner" to "You always make me feel great when you give me a huge".

MEETING UP!!!

* Talk about your past when you catch up with one of your regular or not so regular friends.

- Trust me when I say this -.There is nothing more romantic in a relationship or rapport building in a long-term friendship than to bring up what you have both done in the past... This allows you both to look over old times, what you have done and what you might not be doing now that you have both been missing.

* Talk about your future.

- Talk with someone in your social circle about your future and how you see yourself with them.

- Guys, don't just do this with your girlfriends. Actually go out and talk with one of your buddies or talk with a family member and say "I really would like to do XYZ activity in future with you, want to join me?"

- This allows you to plan something fun with a friend and may also enable you to rekindle old or existing friendships/relationships.

- Also, it allows you to communicate better with your relations and keep them in your social loop. Trust me, this will save a lot of social heartache later.

FINALLY!!!

* When you catch up with people in your social circle, break old or existing habits which exist in your social life.

- I.e. Instead of going to that same restaurant, cafe, club or pub where you always catch up as your regular social outing... CHANGE THE EVENT.

- Change allows you to enhance your social relations, do new activities together and also meet new people who may have similar interests to you.

MAKING THE EFFORT!!

I make it an effort to do these things twice a week. Of course they don't take the entirety of my day to do. I often will spend no more than an hour, sometimes more if I am having fun on each of these days doing such activities. Indeed, if you are cut for time you could always do this once a week, but I recommend doing it twice weekly because your more than likely to get positive results and keep for yourself at the very least... A robust ongoing social life.

Count. Daniel John Fogarty, Thursday the 24th of October 2013

How to Communicate with Family Members Successfully!

How to Communicate with Family Members successfully!

 

 

Communicating with family members is never an easy task to undertake. Especially when family members have expectations placed upon how they and others, especially you must act in a family setting.

Every family unit is different and may have expectations on what behaviour, customs and characteristic roll plays will occur within it. Given this, there are some traits of universal human communication which supersede these behaviours, customs and characteristics. Some of these traits will be explored below in point form, giving you some helpful tips and pointers on how to better interact with members of your family. Some of these traits and techniques are:

* Paraphrasing - When you listen to a family member speak, repeat back what they have said to you in your own words.
- Repeat back some of the key words that this family member has said to you, as a form of catch phrase. This also has the added effect of showing the family member that you respect them.

* Matching and Mirroring - Match and Mirror the other member of the families body language. This means that you be a mime and follow what another person does.
- Try to do this at least 20 seconds after the other family member around you changes their body posture and tone of voice.

* Maintain Eye Good Eye Contact - By maintaining good eye with the other family member with whom you are communicating with you are showing your respect to this other family member.

* Turn Your Head on a Slight 45 Degree Angle.
- When you tilt your head at 45 degrees, it shows the other family member with whom you are communicating that they have something interesting to say.

* Use Humor to Build Rapport and Lighten Conversation when Appropriate.
- I.e. If your talking with a family member, about a family matter which is not serious then by all means use humor.
- If the matter is serious, then never ever use humor!
- Humor should only be used in the family as a means to increase your communication ability and rapport with another family member, it should never be used at anyone else's expense... Including your own.
- Do not tell childish jokes to an adult family member; likewise do not tell adult jokes to kids. Sounds straight forward, yet many people do it.

* Use Honesty - Be honest enough to tell the truth, but not honest enough to put yourself in danger with another family member.
- THINK ABOUT THE CONTEXT of your honesty and where you are using it when communicating with another family member.

Conversations are Always Important!!!

 

* Having Important Conversations.
- If you need to tell another family member something which may emotionally disturb them, then you need to find the right set and setting in order to tell them. For instance does your child or adult family member chuck dangerous tantrums when something upsets them.
    - Likewise, if you are a child of an aggressive parent who is known to be indirectly-violent when something upsets them, pick the location where you will tell them something important which may involve you and them in safety.

Learning how to communicate with your family is an art-form and is the type of art-form where you are the social artist and the other family member is the artwork. Because communication is such an important tool to learn in all of your relationships, I have decided to write the next blog tomorrow on how to work successfully in the workplace with harmonious workplace relationships being the focus.

Count. Daniel John Fogarty, Wednesday 23rd of October 2013